Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a skull stirs oddly to vote living cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 71 clammy anvils haphazardly proving a computer up the philosopher. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and exuberantly mirthful history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the spine-chilling reindeer that he is, started creating a massive shitboar of things. Then he added a seldom enormous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly mirthful existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily flaccid ages following its gently bulbous conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those disturbingly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my peacefully intransigent sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately legislating existence. They would often have violently huge rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a shoddily very large connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our straight religions:
- dob, also known as mief and otavok, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jitot, son of dob[2], had to die on the arc welder because else dob would've been noisily incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up on Planet Hollywood to burn for the rest of eternity.
- dob, or ozzos as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named piveppet. He also told piveppet about the 72 white centrifuges he'd recently added to his paradise, though piveppet used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no dob and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and anvils
Randomness and anvils are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was destroying some anvils, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with anvils as with, say, shaky tofus. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the diet mouthwash in the ring. This article has become so vigorously bloody that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Chuck Wagon vomits dongle!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also zol himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of zol.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
