From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation
Jump to search
Rest In Peace brave souls
|
|
|
|
| Today's Featured Article
|
In Memoriam
Is it with great sadness that Uncyclopedia must report the loss of two of the most beloved members of the Uncyclopedian Community. A day of mourning has been announced.
Todd "Howlin'" Lyons and Some "Fingers" User worked tirelessly for the betterment of others, and both in their own unique ways have improved and left their mark on the Uncyclopedia you see before you today. Their self sacrifice will long be remembered, and plans are underway to erect a fitting monument, the Tomb of the Unknown Contributor.
A minute's deletion is to be observed.
|
| On this day...
|
|
May 20: Have a Vision of the Virgin Mary Day (South America and Spain), Bacon Appreciation Day (America)
- 200 - Bacon is invented in Turkey.
- 1492 - Christina Columbus, the illegitimate daughter of a mediocre sailor, discovers a new continent, only to have her father Christopher claim the discovery as his own.
- 1551 - For an entire year, people make lame jokes about anagrams and dying of syphilis.
- 1732 - Queen Victoria, the Virgin Queen, declares war on France. Again.
- 1874 - Pope Pius IX sees the Virgin Mary on a strip of delicious bacon.
- 1927 - Charles Lindbergh impresses two continents and wins a load of cash.
- 1932 - Popeye is introduced to extra virgin Olive Oyl.
- 1971 - Responding to the Soviet Union's announcement of the day before the BBC start legal proceedings for copyright violation, claiming Mars 2 is just a cheap knock off of Button Moon.
- 1988 - Night Court is cancelled. The suicide rate for shut-ins triples overnight.
- 1995 - Some guy finally translates De Bello Gallico.
- 1999 - Sophia Capicola directs the The Virgin Suicides to the delight of spaced out club kids everywhere.
- 2004 - McCaulay Caulkin finally loses his virginity while falling from a cliff.
- 2007 - Illegal aliens crossing the US/Mexico border see the Virgin Mary in the Bush Administration's new 10000 volt border fence.
|
|
| Word of the Day
|
Death
Try to use it in conversation.
Knowledge is power.
|
| In the news
|
- Oscar Wilde writes a poem showing what he thinks about the deaths of Some User and Todd Lyons(he misses them very much).
- Editors of uncyclopedia.wikia.com die and appoint earwig-human hybrid to manage Recent News.
- Jesus was revived. But Norwegian Space Ottars mistook him for a fish and buried him in their gardens. He died.
- Gothic people slit their wrists and write tragic poems, nothing newsworthy there...
- The emos commit mass suicide, but nobody cares...duh...
- Mourners flow through the streets of New York in melodramatic fashion,
demonstrating, parading, blocking traffic and inciting riots.
- All Uncyclopedians are wearing black armbands.
- The Japanese are comitting mass seppuku.
- The British are maintaining a stiff upper lip. In France, rioting ensues.
- Physicists at IITb publish a paper no one could understand. Basically they wanted 1 hour of strict mourning to be observed.
- The State Department for Social Security will NOT pay successors' pensions to the relatives.
- All the Russians are drunk. All the Dutch are stoned. Peyote use at an alarming high among Native Americans.
- In the middle east the streets are full of women wailing loudly.
- The Americans have organised a drive through service.
a duh /b/ was here
|
| If anyone cares on a day like today...
|
*... that the Michigan Firehouse Museum is home to the largest collection of fire truck bell hanger mounting rivets in the United States?
- ... that I don't know that you don't know that I don't know that you don't know nothing?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Protected by Sacred Ground, and our Prayers.
